You’re an uncaring bastard and smell of piss,
You repulse me so much when you try to kiss,
You slur your words and repeat yourself over,
I want to shove you off the white cliffs of Dover.

You’re a waste of space and a loss of good air,
I’d like to see you savaged by a wild bear.
You should be castrated so you can’t reproduce,
Your balls chopped and blended, made into a mousse.

You’re a selfish drunk, a disgusting freak,
I want to beat your head with an oversized leek.
I hope one day to hear of your sad demise,
As if you hadn’t guessed, it’s you I despise.